Where Have I Been?

So if you have been following this blog you may have noticed that no work has been done for a while……..Please don’t think that I have been lounging around Marrakech, enjoying the sunshine that has at last peeped its way out of the rain clouds.  

A long time ago when I was just a  a girl I met a boy. I was a model, adventur0us, dramatic and slightly out of control. He was the photographers assistant, calm, placid and patient. We fell in love……..We stayed together for quite a few years even though we were not very suited. It was a teenage romance the kind that is doomed to fail even though the parties involved never see it. One day when we were still nothing more than a couple of kids we found out we were having a baby. My family were horrified and told us not to go ahead. But we did and I gave birth to an exceptional little boy shortly after. ( I know all mummys think their children are exceptional but he truly is). Shortly after this life changing event  the penny dropped. As I began to look at my relationship that wasn’t working, I realised it wasn’t enough. I realised I had made a mistake and that this couldn’t possibly be it for the rest of my life. I looked into the big brown eyes of my son and knew he needed much more than we could offer and for him to grow up in an unhappy home full of arguments and discontent would be sad. So we left. We packed our bags and started over. It was a struggle at first to be 20year old single mum. His father was heartbroken. We remained friends. I worked hard to support us. His father helped when ever he could.

As life progressed we both met other people and fell in love, for me things worked out. For him not really. My son clearly inheriting his fathers placid nature lived through the madness of  moving continents, accepted new cultures, new languages, and new schools and always remained patiently by my side. Until just recently when he left Morocco in September of last year to continue his studies back home in London. He was looking forward to spending time with his dad. On the 11th of March this year I got a call from my son to tell me that his father had passed away, found by his flatmate he had died during the night he was only  41. He had suffered for most of his life with Diabetes. We are still waiting for the inquests verdicted.

So I left Marrakech and flew to London to be with my shocked and shaken boy, and his fathers  family to  mourn the loss of  one of my oldest friends.

I have been back in Marrakech for a bit, grumpy as hell and not in the mood to write.

Life can sometimes by so damn unfair.

Only the good die young.

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~ by marrakechxanthepat on April 7, 2009.

4 Responses to “Where Have I Been?”

  1. I had been wondering where you were and now that i know I just want to send you healing hugs and support…take care…

  2. It is good to open your heart in such a tender loving way.
    I have a similar story but mine ended happily. After being apart from my love and my daughter for 38 years we are back together.
    We parted , she went to South Africa but returned three years ago. We are happy again. The sadness for you will fade but the memories will stay. Stay strong.

  3. Sorry to hear, I was one of those that loyally checks this blog. Be save and heart

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